Stay

This is just the song that I have to agree to.

Sugarland - Stay

Official Video: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yIyxkZod2cM

I've been sitting here staring at the clock on the wall
And I've been laying here praying, praying she won't call
It's just another call from home
And you'll get it and be gone and I'll be crying

And I'll be begging you, baby, beg you not to leave
But I'll be left here waiting with my heart on my sleeve
Oh, for the next time we'll be here
Seems like a million years and I think I'm dying
What do I have to do to make you see she can't love you like me?

Why don't you stay? I'm down on my knees
I'm so tired of being lonely, don't I give you what you need?
When she calls you to go, there is one thing you should know
We don't have to live this way, baby, why don't you stay? Yeah

You keep telling me, baby there will come a time
When you will leave her arms and forever be in mine
But I don't think that's the truth
And I don't like being used and I'm tired of waiting
It's too much pain to have to bear to love a man you have to share

Why don't you stay? I'm down on my knees
I'm so tired of being lonely, don't I give you what you need?
When she calls you to go, there is one thing you should know
We don't have to live this way, baby, why don't you stay?

I can't take it any longer but my will is getting stronger
And I think I know just what I have to do
I can't waste another minute after all that I've put in it
I've given you my best, why does she get the best of you?
So next time you find you wanna leave her bed for mine

Why don't you stay? I'm up off my knees
I'm so tired of being lonely, you can't give me what I need
When she begs you not to go, there is one thing you should know
I don't have to live this way, baby, why don't you stay? Yeah, oh

Project Dear Darling #30: Greeting Cards

Dear Darling,

Words that can't be expressed. The sadness that can be drowned in sorrows. Maybe joy can be concealed behind a card. A word of faith, a compliment of beauty, or maybe a little of love.

Sometimes in our darkest moments, none of us are there for each other. There isn't a moment where we think we're thinking of each other. Your face is vague, your physical is abstract, your presence is a doubt. How could one love an inanimate object, a non-existent being, someone from another planet. If let's just say I'm from planet Earth, and you're from planet Bob, where will our bridge be? Where will the world end before mine find yours, or likewise?

Is that a question that needs to be answered? I believe in fate, I believe in sharing. I believe in being there for you. I believe in everything that could bring me to you. Build a rocket for me, and I'll fly straight. Buy me an air ticket to travel half the globe to find you. Interesting perception, interesting fantasy. I can't live in this, nor can I be in this state.

A year is almost passing, and another will soon too. Seasons will just keep changing but my heart will never. Stay a while and listen. This comfort, warm promise can only be a greeting card from me to you. Like a coffee stain, it will never disappear. Keep it.

"It represents my voice, it represents my presence. It presents my faith, it presents my trust. A card, a greeting one."


Love,
Sam

It's coming to an end

Speaking of time, it has been really fast. I am still trying to accept the fact that the year 2009 is ending soon and the welcoming of 2010 should be better. Reflecting back on my 2009 resolution. Wait, I didn't had one. I think this year, each semester, I pushed my limits further. Would have definitely not survived if it weren't for my friends who had always been supporting me, including all those who are probably reading this right now.

I had learned a couple of things this year. I learned not to simply trust anyone. The human nature is simply a disaster. Probably a worked up format which mathematicians screw up. What is 1 + 1? Who denotes it as 2? Just by following everything that someone sets up for you, we follow blindly. More of like the blind leading the blind in the darkness. (that's the worst)

#1: The only person you can trust is yourself.

I discovered a little more of myself. I tend to have my moments where I would just sit and listen. I enjoy those moments because if I were to speak, I bet gibberish would come out of my mouth. In fact, it annoys people. Truth is, I never knew how to express myself. Then again, I found out how.

#2: If you don't know what you're gonna say, THINK before you speak, even if it takes you centuries to collect your thoughts.

The simplest joy in life is to just have a cup of coffee in IKEA and chat with the right person. Sounds ironic and interesting, but the bad side of it; wait till I'm 70 and I would feel the real effects of coffee. One cup of IKEA coffee leads to at least 4 cups of them at the end of the day.

#3: Cut down on coffee, try chocolate !

In times of stress, some people won't really know how to control themselves. They would most likely lash out their anger towards a punching bag. I on the other hand, would most likely sleep over it, or utilize it otherwise.

#4: Reading has deemed to be the best way for me to forget everything and start to listen to my own monologue.

Passion is only to be compared to a spark or a candle that has limited wax to burn on. My passion for many different things is compared to a limited amount of capital invested on different properties adding up to the risk which I might not be able to cover up. Funny, I love a lot of things, but my current capability and ability to take up is just way beyond. Blame myself?

#5: As much as I love to do many things and I may not be good at it, it is good enough that I have the senses to enjoy looking at them and appreciating them. The hands and legs? That will be a different story whenever I'm able to do it.

Saving is probably my worst habit right now. Can't afford to save at all. Zilch. Maybe when I start earning? Should figure out a way. Spend too much on satisfying my oral gratification.

#6: A dollar a day can still be counted as saving.

Funny thing about people is that we don't take shit. But on the contrary, I do otherwise and yet be passive about it. Sometimes I wonder if it was the right decision. Sometimes I wonder if it was even a decision to let it go. Sometimes, if life is a wheel, I'm pretty sure it will catch back up on them, someway or another. Read "The Road Less Traveled"

#7: "Life is difficult, one of the greatest truth. Life is a choice"

This is probably hard to accept, but the world probably need optimistic people. Yes, they do die faster each time they get stabbed and they think they might end up in heaven or otherwise, but it definitely does makes the world goes round. The world has become an "interesting" place to live in, and definitely some of these people are needed more some parts in some people's lives to give HOPE.

#8: Whatever happens, it happened for a good reason. (not easy to learn this)

Some plans work. That is why they are called plans. When plans don't work, they are known as failures, or failed plans. Let's call it, happenings. It happened because "happen" happens to be a word that simply means, "out of no where, it just pop out, it was unexpected". Yes, if life give you lemons, you make lemonade. But did it also tell you that if you use a butcher knife, it would/ might slice your finger off?

#9: Simplicity would increase Ockham's Razor and decrease Murphy's Law.

Despite of which side you stand, it never means that you would stand there forever. Flexibility is the key. Sometimes, I might be too rigid over something. Overtly control like my thesis. Weird, but analism is probably another bad realism. Big picture. BIG PICTURE !

#10: Self-confidence.

I think I shall end this post with an X, Dot and a Tee.

This Is It

Days are over,

Slowly slipping away,

Like a soul,

Without its crust.

Colors that faded,

Never returned,

Favors given,

Hate returned.

Such paintings,

Torn to pieces,

Not one blanket,

Fits the security needed.

Just like that,

Time never stopped,

Kept wandering,

Like a lost ghost.

Trays of books,

Empty in content,

Music to the ears,

Tune of the depressed.

This is it,

The life of a dancer,

Once a singer,

Now a writer.

Sat at one corner,

Figuring out,

That was all,

The clock stopped ticking then.

Perfect Sunset

(y)

Picture Credits:
1. CNN

Missing My Coffee Mate

Hi, coffee mate.

I like the richness and cozy talks we had.

Treasured the moments stolen to be together and be happy for a while.

It was a getaway. =)


Photo Credits:
1. Me

Tsunzu Art of Thesis

Well, i really do think Jane is pretty. =p

Then i had these replies instantly.

All the time throughout my thesis 2, i had supportive friends. It isn't anything proud to announce but i do think creating 10k words (9780 to be exact) in just 2 days is frigging expanding my comfort zone. Hate it when my horoscope prediction for the week hits the jackpot.

Club 21

The feeling of hitting 21 seems numb compared to me hitting the age of 20. Like many others would describe me - Uncle. I really believe, an additional number to the big 20 is gonna make any significant difference. (Wait till i'm 30, 40 or 50, then it would be a different story)

How did I celebrate my birthday? Simple. I don't have to fuss about it because my friends organized it. Thanks to everyone especially Mae.

Living the first day of 21 from the occasional birthday fancy dinners. We had PORK burger.

Welcome to Cristangs.

Thanks to the bunch of wonderful friends. =)

Of course I can't miss out my mum and dad (and bro too)

2nd best part of a birthday celebration is Birthday Cake. (So what if I have boring tastes of loving Pandan Layer Cake) =p

I have 4 gifts this year:
1. Fossil wallet (Gezzel + Brenda)
2. Braun Buffel wallet (Uni gang)
3. A box of chocolates (Evie)
4. A diary (Hanny)

I like personal touch.

The extra effort. Thanks bestie. <3

It was definitely a great birthday celebration. FYI, I had a non-alcoholic one. Boo Yah ! Wonder if my 21st birthday wish would come true. Can't really remember what I even wished for. =p

Picture Credits:
1. Mae
2. The worker who works in Cristang
3. Me

Eureka !

This is exactly how i feel for my significant thesis results. =)

I Got A Feeling

That tonight's gonna be a good night.

No one can ever imagine how you enter a qualitative data with many confounding memories. Just gonna suck it in. Nothing can be compared to how badly i screwed my thesis.

"No matter how you plan it, what is meant to happen can never be predicted. Because happening is just something you did not expect or planned for".